Lubavitcher Rebbe; translated by Sholom B. Wineberg

Willingness to Concede to Better Mitzvah Performance In reply to your letters in which you ask my advice regarding a shidduch in which there was an implication [from the other party] with regard to cutting your beard: It is both self-understood and eminen...

OurThe following is the unedited content of a talk by the Rebbe to a family during their Yechidus prior to the wedding of their daughter. The Rebbe indicated that they may publicize his words. SagesSukkah 49b. interpret the verseMichah 6:8. “and walk humb...

Doubts and “Casting Lots” In reply to your letter of the first of Iyar , in which you write with regard to two possible candidates for a shidduch, one of whom you have a stronger positive emotional feeling for, and regarding the other you were told that [...

The Role of Positive Emotional Feelings Positive Emotional Feelings As Well as Rational Appreciation I was pleased to read in your letter that you found many positive qualities in his personality, [i.e., the young man you have been meeting], and that he f...

Not Disturbing One’s Children Until the Proper Time One should not disturb one’s son’s or daughter’s tranquillity [regarding a shidduch] before there is a concrete suggestion that is capable of being actualized and acted upon. For what possible benefit ca...

Marriage Is Not to Be Delayed to a Later Age .. You write about the custom that used to prevail in some of the Yeshivos in times past that they would marry at quite a late age, when they were thirty or older. Our earlier Sages have already bitterly protes...

“Constant Union” The essential quality and substance of a proper marriage is “cleaving to one’s wife and becoming one flesh”Bereishis 2:24. ; which is to say, that one is in a constant state of acquisition and cleaving, rebuffing anything and everything t...

Marriage — An Imperative That Meets With Success You write that you have heard from many people who say that after marriage many problems and difficulties arise. The fact of the matter is that these problems and difficulties do not apply to a large percen...

Getting Married — The Greatest Joy of All Marriage is the greatest degree of joy that is to be found in a human being’s life. So much so, that concerning the joy of marriage, the GemaraBerachos 6b. uses an expression that is not found concerning any other...

Discerning That Which Is Crucial and That Which Is Secondary It has come to my attention that a number of suggestions had been made to you with regard to a shidduch, but for any number of reasons you rejected them all. Quite understandably, one cannot com...